Last time on Project Runway: Lemmings are challenged to create a look for Diane von Furstenberg’s fall/winter collection that only Amex card members can get their grubby paws on. Kenley is convinced that she’s the only person who deserves this prize. Joe triggers bulimia across America in reaction to Terri’s fabric choice. Leanne is surprised and dismayed to learn that her competitors are getting competitive. Leanne wins for creating a sublime outfit that fits seamlessly into Diane’s collection, while Stella is sent home to Ratbones for making pants that look like they’re packing something most women (at least those who are born female) don’t have. Don’t cry for her, though. Little Stella is happy at last. What will happen this time?

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Last time on Project Runway: Designers use car bits to make fashion. Everybody bitches about the difficulty. Keith tries to make what he thinks the judges want, which is bland and pointless and extremely poorly constructed. Leanne wins for making something that Christian Siriano would give his left ball to have created, while Keith is sent home for putting the judges to sleep while creating something the model can’t even sit down in and blaming it on everyone but Keith. What will happen this time?

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I wasn't online yesterday and I shut it down early on saturday what with the birthday celebrating and all, so I just wanted to give a big thanks to everyone who said such nice things about me over the weekend. I'm still blushing. A special shoutout to Mythichistorian for sending me such a nice Vgift. You guys all rock and/or roll!

Also, check it out: I found Buffy's yummy sushi pajamas, AND THEY'RE ON SALE!

http://basement.shoeblogs.com/2008/09/15/as-visions-of-ebi-dance-through-your-head/

Now if they came about one size larger, I could get them and sleep in them and horrify my beloved in them.

Oh, and I don't know if any of you saw the Lifetime biopic on Chanel, but can I just say not only was it stultifyingly dull, but it also was WRONG most of the time. Also? Biggest waste of Shirley McClaine EVER. And she was positively showcased in platinum next to poor Malcolm McDowell. I haven't laughed that hard at a death scene in years...er...not that Shirley or Malcolm was in said death scene...but there was a really, really Cheeze Whizzy one that simultaneously sucked and blew. I did my best hyena impression.

Laast time on Project Runway: Drag queens on parade! Blayne looks like an Astro Pop! The biggest homophobe ever to compete on Project Runway wins the gayest challenge ever because his drag queen teaches him not to make pink Elviswear, and Daniel is sent home despite the fact that Keith sent a wad of filthy toilet paper down the runway. What will happen next?

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Last time on Project Runway: Brooke Shields needs a look for her show, Daniel flounders, Stella pounds leather, Terri breaks Acetate’s…for lack of a better word I’m going to say ‘brain’, Keith wins with an odd outfit that I can’t see in either setting it’s supposed to be for and Kelli goes home because you can’t make high fashion with Really Cheap Fabric. What will happen next?

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1. Comment on this post.
2. I will give you a letter.
3. Think of 5 fictional characters and post their names and your comments on these characters in your LJ.

Hooloovoo42 gifted me with C, and here's who I came up with:

1: Cordelia Chase. Acid tongued, raven haired, snotty, bratty, self-absorbed, yet brilliant at cutting through the bullshit and getting to the painful truth, I loved the character even when she made me cringe. Also, once you managed to get Cordelia on your side, you had a dogged friend forever...whether you wanted her or not.

2: Chuck. That's Lonely Traveller Charlotte Charles from Pushing Daisies. She may not have made much of her life, but she's gotten a lot accomplished during her death. She's found love, lifted her aunts' depression, solved crimes, and made a lot of pie. Chuck proves it's never too late to grab that brass ring, and I love her for it. Besides, she has an awesome fashion sense and hair that I would cause considerable mayhem to have for my own.

3: Chuck. That's Chuck Bartowski from Chuck. He's a heroic geek with a heart of gold. His love for video games and sci-fi is rivalled only by his basic human decency. Chuck is a stand-up guy and I really love him.

4: Charles Emerson Winchester III. We all need a Worthy Opponant in life, and Charles was nothing if not a Worthy Opponant. When he stopped opposing for a moment, though, he could also be a damn good ally.

5: Ensign Pavel Chekov. No, really, everything ever was actually invented in Russia! Most of it by Peter the Great himself. Passionate, loyal, and good-hearted, if a little muzzy on history, The Enterprise was a less colorful place before Chekov came along.

So, who wants a letter?

Comment and I'll give you a letter; then you have to list ten things you LOVE that begin with that letter. Afterward, post this in your journal and give out some letters of your own.

Dara Starscream gave me N to play with. And here we go.

1: Never teh Bride, the primary writer and my partner in crime over at Manolo for the Brides. She's smart, funny, opinionated, and a hell of a lot of fun to work with. It's also her fault that I'm now a professional writer. If she hadn't asked me to fill in for her when she went on her honeymoon, I wouldn't be getting handed a paycheck to spout off about cool stuff like weddings.

2: Neverwhere. I love the concept of another London in the disused Underground stations, and Neil Gaiman's vision of that world fascinates me. Temple and Arch!

3: Nougat. Mmmmm...hazelnut nougat. Delicious, creamy, decadent hazelnut nougat.

4: Nine. Specifically, the Ninth Doctor. Oh, Christopher Eccleston, how I do adore thee!

5: Northanger Abbey. See? I managed to bring Jane Austen into things. This really is a favorite, though. It's such a fun sendup of Gothic literature, which I also enjoy.

6: Nathaniel Hawthorne. I may have read The Scarlet Letter for the first time because it was assigned in Sophmore English, but the other four times I've read it were simply because I enjoy it. Also, I loved Hawthorne long before I read about Hester Prynne. The Wonder Book was my introduction to Greek mythology, and I still love it.

7: Nanki-Poo. Actually, virtually all the characters in the entire Gilbert and Sullivan repertoire. I fell hard when I was introduced to G&S, and have never swerved in my loyalty.

8: Narwhal. Who could not love narwhals? They're just so damn strange.

9: Norweigian Wood. Okay, pretty much all The Beatles' stuff. This one's pretty, but the one that turned my tiny world upside down and opened my mind was Hey Bulldog when I first heard it at the tender age of six. I never looked back.

10: Nekkid Giles. What? You thought I wasn't going to find a way to fit Giles into this? I am his Wench and he will appear on a list of ten loves even if you hand me the letter X...but N made it easy to just undress him, which is always a happy thing for me.

http://www.michaelpalinforpresident.com/

Doods! Check it out!

Last time on Project Runway: Half the designers haven’t seen the Olympics and think the opening ceremonies don’t involve athletes, Joe is a fucking drama queen and a homophobe of the first water and I will never love him again, Blayne hates The Beatles and I hate him, Korto wins with a fairly meh linen outfit and Jennifer is sent home for confusing the opening ceremonies of the Olympics with a production of You’re a Good Man, Charlie Brown. What will happen this time?

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I know, I know, I still haven't caught up on the Project Runway recaps, but I did actually start writing one today...and then got sidetracked when I got a brief but interesting visit from my fic muse. Who knows? There may be a couple B/G romances left in me yet!

But I got thinking about something else while wasting time trying not to clean my kitchen the way it desperately needs to be cleaned. Last night I caught the first episode of the new season of Top Design. It's made by the same people as Project Runway (which explains why it looks so much like PR, though Todd Oldham for all his general niceness and helpfulness is no Tim Gunn) which is to interior design what PR is to fashion design or Top Chef is to cooking.

So the new designers were set a challenge. They were divided into teams. Each team was given one space in a building of loft apartments to furnish and decorate according to the brief given them by their clients: the judges.

Each client/judge talked about what (s)he wanted in that apartment and what was important to them about how the space was set up, what colors were used, and what feel they wanted.

Since I'm always trying to work out what rooms in my home should look like assuming I ever have the budget and lack of clutter to start seriously improving them, I started thinking about what my brief would be if I had hired a designer to redo my home from top to bottom. How would I describe my decorating style? What would I identify as important? I assumed I was giving the designer free range to do as (s)he pleased and not giving specific briefs for individual rooms. I assumed budget was no object and that I already lived in a house whose general shape and style and size were entirely to my liking. Actually, that very last one is not far from wrong. If I had a turret, I would be thrilled, but I love the overall shape and size of my home.

So here's what I came up with: I've always wanted to live in the Addams Family Mansion, but using a color pallette from Yellow Submarine. Think bright colors, lush details, unexpected oddities with a slightly morbid yet whimsical sense of humor. Don't be afraid of the eccentric. I am eccentric. I married an eccentric. We like eccentric things. Oh, and I will personally kill the person who dares to paint ANY surface in my home grey. Grey is right out. Most light greens are also out because my husband feels about light green the way I feel about grey. And dusty rose will get you slaughtered unceremoniously by both of us. Purple, orange, red, turquoise, bright yellow, cobalt, and fuschia will get you love and cookies. I have a deep, unreasoning, and abiding loathing of wallpaper unless it's somewhere it isn't normally expected to be. No wallpaper on the walls, but feel free to put it on furniture. My home must be cat-friendly. Do not do anything that will force me to choose between your design and my cat's ability to go into that room. Your design will lose in a New York minute. I want the place to be practical. I cook in my kitchen, I bathe in my bathroom, and I have a lot of stuff that must be stored or displayed properly. Multifunctional pieces will earn you squeals of delight. I am nightblind, so lighting is a priority. I love things repurposed in surprising ways. I cannot abide an open flame if it isn't the burner of a gas stove. Do NOT put candles ANYWHERE. I hate open plans. I want doors. I want to be able to shut those doors when I feel the urge. I like cubby holes and secret passages. I need a nice corner to work at my computer, a cozy sofa/chair to read in, and someplace to set up my lacemaking equipment. Oh, and please leave a few holes in your design. I love DIY and want a couple small projects I can work on for myself.

So that's what I want my home to look like. If you had the perfect space for you, an unlimited budget, and a designer you trusted with your life, what would be your brief to your designer?

I was doing stockwork in the backroom of a Waldenbooks when I first heard Melissa Etheridge.

There I stood, working on a huge return of mass market paperbacks. The job consisted of taking the books to be returned off the shelves, removing all copies from backstock as well, stripping off the front covers,counting up the covers by publisher and price point, and putting the covers and paperwork into large envelopes to be sent back to the main office and disposing of the coverless books. IOW, it was a long, tedious, miserable task. The one upside was that I got to hide in the back for a couple hours. I had the radio on because otherwise I probably would have gone nuts with nothing for my brain to do but count.

As I tore books apart, rigid with boredom and hating the job for more reasons than the terminal dull, the DJ announced they had a new artist to introduce. From the opening notes of Similar Features, I was hooked. The power and passion of Melissa Etheridge's voice were matched by the raw anger of the lyrics. I was mesmerized.

A little while later, the DJ played Bring Me Some Water and that was it. I stopped at the record store and bought the album on my way home.

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Hey everyone. Miss me?

Yes, I went underground for the Olympics. Yes, I am going to catch up on my Project Runway recaps. In fact, I was working on one today...but it might take a little while.

Why? Because I'm currently bouncing off the fucking walls, that's why. And why am I doing that?

BECAUSE MY BELOVED SCORED US ORCHESTRA SEATS TO THE MELISSA ETHERIDGE CONCERT TOMORROW FREAKING NIGHT!!!!!!

He's not even all that interested in her. He just knows how much I love her music and how much I've always wanted to see her live. So when he found seats still available to see her at a venue where nobody gets away with smoking ANYTHING (probably the biggest reason I don't go to concerts much is my inability to deal with green smoke), he up and got them.

It's official: I have the best fucking husband in the entire damn universe.

Okay, and as I said in the title (remember the title?) of this screed, I have a fic question. My buddy Beaglekat called me yesterday. She calls me every tuesday, whether I need it or not. And after a mere, what?, six or seven years of being my bud, she has suddenly discovered this thing called 'fanfic'...or at least found it for a show she likes.

Beaglekat loves NCIS and at least one of the CSI shows, though I'm not sure which. I mentioned that several members of my flist either write or read fic for these shows. I mentioned a couple names in passing, but I'm pretty sure I've forgotten some, or that someone on my flist reads/writes for these shows that I don't know about, or that someone I know has a friend who has an archive...anyway. If you write for the NCIS or CSIverse, could you leave a comment here to direct Beaglekat to your fic? If you know of a good archive for either verse (Beaglekat is entirely unprejudiced as to 'ships, and is happy to read het, slash, femslash, or gen), again, please leave a link. I have an insatiable reader looking for fic in a pair of verses I'm not well versed in, so give a girl a helping hand, if you can. TIA.

I now return to my bouncing already in progress!

(goes incoherant with joy and faints dead away from squee)

If you don't want to be spoiled about Olympic results of a terribly unexpected sort about a country most of you have never visited in an event most of you probably aren't huge fans of (despite Giles' stated fondness for it), don't look under the cut:

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In other news, I get to gloat a bit because I had a Malnpudl here yesterday. Since I was just beginning to feel slightly less than under the weather, we went out for lunch to my favorite Japanese restaurant where I slurped udon noodles and Mal had a yummy combo that did not include any 'bait' aka: sushi. We then went and got a tiny cheesecake to share for dessert and repaired to my place to watch media and gossip.

In addition to bringing her own wonderful self here, Mal brought gifts. I am now the proud possessor of the entire series of Slings&Arrows. More than that, I now have a glorious bright yellow messanger bag bearing the slogan 'I'm not a control freak, I'm a control enthusiast' on it. (glees hugely)

We watched They Might Be Giants (my contribution) and Bon Cop, Bad Cop (Mal's contribution) and had some lovely laughs.

Mal, we need to do this again soon...and I need to cook for you. Oh, and did I mention I have a very strange movie starring Mark McKinney and Isabella Rossalini that I think you'd enjoy? It's Canadian, eh, and one of the most gloriously surreal films I've seen in many a day.

Have I mentioned life is good?

Hi everybody.

Between the cold from hell and the start of the Olympics, I've gone quiet again, but I just had to come do a drive by gloat at you all this morning because Malnpudl is coming to visit me today, and she's not coming to see you.

So nyaah.

That is all.

Previously on Project Runway: New York at night is given as inspiration to a group of sadly uninspired designers, Kenley trash-talks Keith, but that’s okay because Keith isn’t here to make friends, Tim warns Emily that her dress is dire, Kenley wins for making a cross between a muffin and a lawn chair while Emily is auf’ed for failing to listen to Tim. Who will go home this week?

Follow the bouncing LJ cut to find out!

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Well, I'm down and out with the cold my brother so generously shared with me. Thanks, Chelemby!

Anyway, due to extreme snottiness and lassitude, I haven't got the Project Runway recap done yet. It should go up sometime tomorrow, though.

In the meantime, I just want to say that any love I had brewing for Joe is now dead as a doorknob. Those who want details will get them tomorrow.

In the meantime, I do have something to share with you all. Many of you are aware of the fact that Mr. Wench is a musician. What you may not be aware of is the fact that his music is now available on iTunes. Check out the album Sure Thing, You Bet by his band, Ariel, at this addy:


http://phobos.apple.com/WebObjects/MZStore.woa/wa/viewAlbum?
id=275679855&s=143441

You've also heard me talk about my buddy Chelle and her band, Chelle and Friends. Well, their album, Sweetbread, is also available on iTunes at:

http://phobos.apple.com/WebObjects/MZStore.woa/wa/viewAlbum?
id=279596914&s=143441

So if you're in the market for some good music and feel like supporting some good folk, as well, give them a listen. Thanks to you all.

Since my beloved is out and Chelemby has a bad cold and doesn't want a normal dinner, I get to have whatever the hell I want!!

So here I sit with my lovely little trout sauteed in a bit of butter, roast itty bitty red-skinned potatoes, and roast Brussels sprouts. Mmmmmm...yummy.

What are the rest of you did for dinner? Or, in the case of...nearly everybody, what did you have?

I think its inevitable that as we read each other's journals we create mental pictures of each other. Post this on your own journal to find out who your friends see when they read about your life.

Two Rules:
1) The person must be in the movies or on TV (but doesn't have to be an actor/actress). The person can be specific to a role (e.g. Jennifer Elhe's Elizabeth Bennet) or just the person themself.
2) Post a picture!

Okay, so the Lifetime Network is having a theme week. Fallen Angels: Girls Gone Bad.

Now when I see that title given to a theme, I sort of expect to see films about women who become prostitutes, or addicts, or take up murder as a part-time hobby. I'd be more than content with a few female peeping toms or embezzlers. I know Lifetime has plenty of film in the can for all of these subjects. Also, seductresses, baby snatchers, corporate bitches, and well, just about any other heinous thing a woman can be or do.

So why oh why were BOTH of the first two films I saw in the theme about women being murdered by their abusive/psycho boyfriends? One was a high school honor student being smacked around by her wrestling team hero boyfriend until she decided to leave him and he decided no girl was going to leave him and get to be with anyone else. In the second film, a college student is attracted to her anthropology professor who seduces her and then strangles her because she spilled a glass of wine on his notes. I think it was their second date. He then leads the girl's mother on a merry goose chase looking for her missing child.

In what way have these two girls gone bad? Is Lifetime referring to the smell after they've been in their makeshift graves for a few days? Because honestly, the worst thing either girl did was have rotten taste in guys. Oh, and one was a little sloppy with the wine. Yeah, that was a good reason for him to kill her.

When I tune in to see 'girls gone bad' I fully expect them to take some active role in the matter beyond spilling a drink or wanting to make excuses for the guy what done her wrong. I'm tuning in expecting to see at absolute minimum a serial shoplifter, not a hapless victim.

Lifetime, I'm putting you on notice. If you tell me you're giving me bad girls, I want to see Kelli Martin gut Tori Spelling like a fish. I want to see your latest Leona Helmsley biopic. I want to see a deranged baby snatcher and the woman who will cheerfully kill the baby snatcher to get her child back. I want to see black widows and teen prostitute/drug runners.

In other words, if you promise me bad girls, please deliver bad girls instead of perfectly good girls who make one or two bad choices about whom to trust.

Kthnxbai.

Poll #1233772
Open to: All, detailed results viewable to: All

What is the next flavor of pie Wench should bake?

Aaaannnnd...

Poll #1233773
Open to: All, detailed results viewable to: All

What should Wench bake for Tim Gunn when she rescues him from the current Project Runway designers?

Vote! It's patriotic and it amuses Cronopio!